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In the words of the Masked Dentist: Funny Denture Patients’ Stories

Masked DentistBy Dr. John O’Keefe

Prologue

I recently spoke to a dental colleague who has just retired and we were talking fondly of denture patients we had seen over the years and how some clinical experiences bring back a smile (when thinking of them in hindsight). Here are a few short vignettes that he recounted to me.

In the words of this “Masked Dentist”

“I did an extern in the North in the late 70s between my 3rd and 4th year in dental school. It was with a dentist (let’s call him Bill) who is to this day a real hero of mine. It was an amazing experience that allowed me to do so much dentistry, that my 4th year in dental school was a breeze.     

Bill had a patient arrive with no teeth and he wanted a set of dentures. I never got to see the patient. Bill explained that it would take several visits, the patient told him he was only coming back one more time and that was to pick up his dentures. Bill took a set of alginate impassions and estimated the bite etc. The patient had hard ridges that showed little bone loss because the patient had all his teeth removed and never had dentures, but claimed he could eat everything except Brazilian nuts.

When the patient came back for the denture fit appointment, he put the teeth in and Bill did a few adjustments. Then, the patient put them in his pocket. When Bill asked why he was getting dentures, the patient responded that he was going to wear them at his eldest daughter’s wedding and that he had four daughters and planned to wear them only 4 times.  

Another story from that same externship was about a First Nations fellow who arrived at the office very drunk with a set of dentures that he had taken a set of pliers to and removed all the teeth. Bill related to me that the dentures had been made by the ‘Indian Affairs Dentist.’ When Bill asked why he had removed all the teeth, he said ‘brown man wants white teeth’ and the ones the other dentist had given him were too dark.

Bill made him a set with the whitest colour possible. Bill was at first embarrassed but the patient loved them. Bill mentioned that he was clearly inebriated at every appointment! He had stopped drinking years earlier, but could not face a dentist sober even though it was all painless. Bill introduced me to him on the street one day and the patient had great praise for Bill, and very white teeth. In addition to having great praise for Bill, he said he had not touched a drop since his last dental visit!

In my early days in practice, I did extensive work with seniors and their dentures. I did some challenging work with stroke victims who needed special dentures because of changed bites and sagging faces. But my third story relates to a lady, who hadn’t suffered a stroke. I examined her and clearly she had a set of dentures that were two sizes too big! I made her a new set, but she was reluctant to give up the one’s she was wearing because they were her late husband’s.

My final story comes from a nurse who worked in seniors care for years. This nurse one-upped my previous story and related an incident in which a lady arrived in care and when her husband came to visit he made a stink because they had “lost” her dentures. He phoned to apologize the next day because he found them when he took his shirt off and they fell out of his back where they had been lodged between fat folds. They figured he had rolled on to them in bed and did not notice them.

Epilogue 

Invitation to dentists who read this post

Have you any funny incidents to share based on your experiences in clinical practice? If so, please feel free to contact me directly. I will work with you to ensure that your story comes from the “Masked Dentist” (who is meant to plausibly represent any Canadian dentist and his or her real experiences in the course of a career in dentistry). We take the Masked Dentist approach because we believe that the sharing of important experiences is very worthwhile and educative, but we don’t want to hinder such sharing because people have a concern about being identified or identifiable.

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